This entry is from our Expert Guest series where wedding and honeymoon professionals share their best tips on creating memories that last a lifetime.
So, you’re getting married! Congratulations! You’ve met the person of your dreams and you’re ready to start planning for the big day.
The thing is, you can already feel the pressure to make your wedding ‘the best day of our lives’.
And there’s nothing wrong with that. Dreaming about your wedding day may have preoccupied your mind for a long time. But, while it should be a wonderful day to remember, the type of pressure we put on ourselves to make it perfect can wreak havoc on our emotions.
What if the catering’s ruined? What if the weather goes bad? What if no-one shows up?!
When it comes to wedding planning, if there’s one thing you should be able to rely on, it’s that your partner shows up on the day. That’s because, in the end, accepting each other’s hand in marriage is all that matters.
So, when you begin the wedding planning process think of it this way – while you can’t control what happens on the day, you can control how much preparation you put in. Plus, keep in mind that your wedding is just ‘day one’ of your amazing lifetime journey together.
How Will You Feel In The Run-Up?
Statistics show that brides make an average of 177 decisions in the lead up to their wedding. With so many aspects to plan for, couples can feel stressed. And the problem is, too much stress can have detrimental effects on your wellbeing.
To help you plan for what to expect, we’ve listed a few of the rollercoaster emotions you’re likely to end up grappling with as you plan a wedding:
You wouldn’t be human if you weren’t at least a little excited about expressing your vows to your dearest one. After your engagement, you’ll feel the anticipation start to build.
As with many aspects of life, there’s a good chance something won’t go to plan. Often, though, it’s the smallest things that can trigger our fears.
When you’re hosting a wonderful celebration, you can’t expect to make everyone happy. Many times, expectations from others can lead to frustration, anger, and resentment.
Shouldering too many responsibilities before the day can leave you feeling fatigued and lacking energy.
Emotions can get the better of all of us. But the last thing you want is to spiral into panic, anxiety, or feel out-of-sorts at your wedding.
8 Tips To Stay Strong And Reduce Pre-Wedding Stress
1. Don’t let everything rest on you
While it’s true that too many viewpoints can spoil your vision, you shouldn’t expect to shoulder all the responsibility yourself.
Make it a priority to accept any offers of help. There’s truth to the adage ‘lighten the load’.
You can do this by bringing the right people close to you during your pre-wedding events, such as a bridal shower or engagement party. Use these moments to ask others what they could do to help you out.
2. Focus on self-care
When we’re busy taking care of every aspect of our lives, getting enough rest and relaxation seems like a luxury. It’s not.
Insomnia affects one-third of the population and leads to severe mental and emotional disorders such as depression and anxiety.
If getting enough sleep is difficult, dedicate an afternoon to spending time in the spa or finding time to meditate. See it as an investment in yourself. If you do, you’ll be grateful for the benefits you’ll gain.
3. Hire a wedding planner
Of course, there’s always the option of hiring someone else to do the work.
If you do go the route of recruiting a wedding planning business, make sure they include text messaging in their services. SMS is ideal to manage and coordinate wedding plans and will reduce stress. Also, you’ll get peace of mind knowing your planner is a text message away.
Capturing your special day on film is also a popular option, with many talented videographers and photographers available for hire. You can always book these businesses in advance to avoid any last minute hassles. To help you stay positive through the process, why not plan how you’ll share and distribute your wedding film after the big day?
4. Plan ahead
If a wedding planner isn’t an option, give yourself plenty of time to plan.
Start by checking out the latest bridal trends and think about how you could customize them to your tastes.
If you do intend to use new suppliers, make sure not to wait until the wedding day to try them out. Give yourself enough time to find the right hairdressers, stylists, or make-up artists. If you don’t, you could end up with some unwanted surprises and painful regrets.
5. Share your frustrations with someone you trust
Talking therapies exist because they work. By taking the time to share your feelings with others, you can relieve some of the pressure you’ll feel. Talking to someone you trust helps to put anxieties into perspective. Plus, it can spur you on to feel proud of what you’ve achieved or to keep going.
If finding the right friend or family member feels difficult, know that there are a range of web sources that offer one-to-one, instant messaging support in times of need.
6. Don’t focus on impressing others
Your wedding day is about you and your partner. So, your choices should reflect the needs and desires of both of you, not others.
You may find that your stress levels increase when you’re feeling worried or pressured about what others will think.
Instead, do what’s right for your wedding and for the choices you make for your honeymoon or mini-moon. The time you spend after your wedding should be your best opportunity to relax, not to show off. Choose a honeymoon destination that makes you and your partner happy, and one that’s practical for both of you.
7. Don’t sweat the small stuff
What does it matter if there’s a small hiccup on the day?
Worrying that everything has to be perfect will make it harder to manage your feelings. Instead, try to enjoy things as they unfold. Studies show that stress levels are higher today than they were 30 years ago. So, if you do find that something goes wrong, know that being well-rested, relaxed, and free of stress during the run-up will build your resilience and help you to bounce back with ease.
8. Be kind to yourself
Know that it’s ok to be nervous. If you are less comfortable with the spotlight, remember that everyone can feel emotional around the time of a wedding. Don’t be afraid to temporarily escape any situation to manage your feelings, or to have some time alone to take it all in. Do try to get some good supporters around you, too.
In the end, when the day comes, the most important thing is to focus on enjoying yourselves. You’ll have done your very best to plan the best day of your life, so enjoy it!
For many people, the effects of the pandemic have increased their levels of stress. So, when you do start to make arrangements for your wedding, remember that everyone will be feeling a little more fragile than usual. Sometimes, knowing that we’re all struggling can help us feel closer.
To help you further, why not take a look at our advice on planning a wedding in coronavirus times? With a little help, you will find it easier to stay strong and enjoy the best that your wedding experience has to offer.
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