honeymoon registry

Can you ask wedding guests for money?

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This entry is from our Expert Guest series where wedding and honeymoon professionals share their best tips on creating memories that last a lifetime.

Sometimes it’s difficult to work out the accepted wedding etiquette. After all, you’ve most likely never had to plan a wedding before! There are so many things you are expected to know: When should you send out a save the date? Who can you leave off the guest list? Can you tell people not to bring their kids? One of the most touchy areas, in etiquette as in life, involves money and how people are asked to spend it. Specifically, can you ask people for money in lieu of gifts? Can you ask them to spend their money on certain gifts instead of others? The answer is, it’s complicated.

Tactfully circulate your gift preferences

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The reason this is such a touchy issue is that making any statement about gifts can seem presumptuous. After all, your guests aren’t obligated to bring a gift. It’s supposed to be a nice extra. A bonus, not something you can count on ahead of time. Asking people to select a gift from a registry can sound like asking for loot, and even worse, asking for money or something else instead of gifts can sound ungrateful for anything else your guests may have planned to give you.

On the other hand, of course, many guests appreciate having some guidance on what they can spend money on. They don’t want to waste money buying a gift you don’t need or don’t like, so some indication can be helpful. They may prefer to give cash, but worry about seeming rude by failing to pick out a thoughtful gift. This has become especially pertinent in a time when many couples live together for years prior to marriage, or at least live independent of their parents beforehand. People usually have the kitchenware and towels sorted years before the wedding. But of course, lots of couples would love fancy new things for starting their married life, so expectations can get pretty complicated!

Know when to tell guests about gift preferences

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Asking Guests For Wedding Gifts Of Money Or Specific Items

So what’s a bride to do? Can you help your guests out, or is it rude to do so? The answer is yes, help them out! But do it in an appropriate way. What is appropriate? Glad you asked! You have three main options:

Include a separate gift card

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1. Add a card to your wedding invitation suite

First things first, you should never include information about gifts, cash or registries on a save the date or on the wedding invitation itself. What you can do, however, is to include a separate card that gives your guests information about your preference for gifts. Word it tastefully. Something like “We have already been blessed with everything we need for our home! If you wish to bring a gift, a contribution to our wishing well would be greatly appreciated.” Make sure it is clear that the gift is optional, that you sound thankful, and that you use tactful euphemisms. “A contribution to our wishing well” will always sound better than ‘cash’.

Add details to a wedding website

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2. Add the information to your wedding website

Got a wedding website to share information with your guests? This is the perfect setting for information about gifts! This can work in tandem with an information card in your wedding invitation suite, but it is also considered more acceptable to include the details of your wedding website on the invitation itself rather than specifics about gifts if you would prefer to keep it to one card.

Set up a section on your website marked something like “registry,” “‘wishing well,” or “a note on gifts.”  Use the same tips on wording as above: be thankful, keep things optional, and be careful about your choice of terminology.

Rely on word of mouth

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3. Rely on word of mouth

This is a good option if you are worried about offending certain guests or if your preference on gifts is not as firm. All you have to do here is let your parents, siblings, and bridal party know where you have registered or what your arrangements are. People who are stuck for ideas on gifts are likely to ask them (or you!) for ideas, and they can spread the word. Those who have their own thing in mind are unlikely to ask and will get you whatever they had planned on anyway. This is obviously less efficient, but is a good option if you’re not certain about how to handle it.

So that’s how to handle it. Let people know your preferences in a tactful way that is focused on helping make their lives easier rather than on making demands based solely on what you want, and people will be appreciative. Whether you’re registered somewhere, hoping for cash to put towards a house or paying off the wedding, or looking for donations to charity in lieu of presents, it’s just a matter of keeping it off the invitation and being polite.

Your Honeyfund honeymoon registry offers a tasteful way to ask for money!

Bio: This post was written by Maddison Wallace from Paperlust, Australia, where print design lovers and independent creatives unite.

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This entry is from our Expert Guest series where wedding and honeymoon professionals share their best tips on creating memories that last a lifetime.

September is an increasingly popular time to get married. Technically part of summer, the days are still warm, even though the nights can be cool. Some wedding planners debate whether a wedding at this time as a summer or fall one, so you can go with summer or fall colors. After a lovely ceremony, you can  plan a dream honeymoon in September some of the most inviting warm locations around the globe.

Great Places to Honeymoon in September

Honeymoon in September on the Almadfi Coast

Almalfi Coast, Italy

Cap off your wedding with a trip to this picturesque coastline along the Mediterranean! Take advantage of the end of the tourist season and the small crowds, by planning day trips to Pompei and Naples. With temperatures in the low 70’s, be sure to take a boat excursion over to the island of Capri. The views will be breathtaking!

Honeymoon in September in the Napa Valley CA

Napa, CA

Napa Valley, California has some of the most splendid scenery in the world, along with incredible restaurants — and of course, the wine! Take a tour of the sparkling wine vineyard at Domaine Chandon, enjoying a tasting of their best bubbly on their beautiful grounds. Stroll through nearby Yountville,  a charming town with tasting rooms and world class restaurants on every corner. If you’re up for it, grab a bicycle from your hotel – most will have them on site — and ride around to local vineyards to take in the amazing views.

Honeymoon in September on the Island of Mallorca

Mallorca, Spain

If you picture pristine water, sandy beaches, and amazing weather for your honeymoon, then you must visit Mallorca! There are over 360 beaches on the island some busy and popular, others smaller and secluded. Try a different beach every day- white sand for Monday, rocky cliffs for Tuesday, and port-side for Wednesday. You will return home satisfied and sun-kissed!

Luxury spa on you honeymoon in September

Lake Tahoe, CA

Treat yourself in the fresh air and beautiful scenery of Lake Tahoe – you deserve it! The Ritz Carlton, Lake Tahoe has everything you need to feel pampered and relaxed. Indulge yourself in the many amenities the spa has to offer – a warm stone massage, a revitalizing facial, or a soothing manicure. Finish the day with a soak in the spa’s heated pool. Any remaining wedding stress will melt away!

Honeymoon in September at Monaco French Riveria

Monaco, French Riviera

Monaco has something for everyone! The royal principality located on the French Riviera, offers spectacular and exciting excursions along with romantic and extravagant experiences. Dreamy strolls along the coast, shows at the opera house, adventures at the famous Casino de Paris, head-turning Ferrari rides – Monaco has it all. Lifetime memories are sure to be made on this honeymoon!

Honeymoon in September in Santa Barbara CA

Santa Barbara, CA

Santa Barbara offers an international feel and a cultural experience in the beautiful location of southern California. It holds a variety of experiences from wine tastings and art museum tours to whale watching and cruising the Pacific. And don’t forget the cuisine-foodie paradise in Santa Barbara! Treat yourself to the ultimate luxury with accommodations at the Four Seasons Resort: The Biltmore Santa Barbara, settled in between the Pacific Ocean and Santa Ynez Mountains – it’s truly spectacular!

Honeymoon in September in St Lucia

Jade Mountain, St Lucia

Photos of this serene location speak volumes! Jade Mountain Resort consists of 24 sanctuaries – rooms with a beautiful infinity pool and a stunning view of the Caribbean Sea. Your living space and nature flow together to create a unique, one-of-a-kind experience. Step outside of your room (if you must!) and enjoy the beautiful beaches, scuba diving, hiking, and other outdoor activities the resort has to offer.

Honeymoon in September at Lanai, Hawaii

Lanai, Hawaii

Looking for romance? The Four Seasons at Lanai Hawaii is the perfect location for a romantic getaway. Adult-only lagoon pools, outdoor walking paths, private sailboat charters, and phenomenal cuisine make for a dreamy vacation. Don’t forget to snap a pic at “Sweetheart Rock” while you’re there – ideal honeymoon photo-opp!

Honeymoon in September at Palmetto Islands, SC

Palmetto Bluff, SC

The Montage Palmetto Bluff is the perfect mix of luxury and charm. Spend your honeymoon at this classic southern resort; you will enjoy every minute! A few highlights include- spa and wellness center, charming village shops and restaurants, nature preserve and walking trails, impeccably manicured golf course, large marina with a plethora of water sports, and the most perfectly designed cottages and homes. With all of these experiences at your fingertips, there is no need to leave the resort; however neighboring towns like Hilton Head and Savannah make for great day trips.

Honeymoon in September in Anguilla

Anguilla, Caribbean

If you’re looking for a mix of adventure and a mix of relaxation, look no further than Anguilla! Here you’ll find scuba diving, snorkeling, wind surfing, paddle-boarding, whale-watching, swimming with dolphins, kayaking, canoeing, and more! We highly recommend staying at the Viceroy resort while you’re there. White sand beaches, pool and spa, beautiful modern architecture, and luxury rooms make for an unforgettable honeymoon!

Plan ahead for a beautiful honeymoon by including your trip in your wedding registry. Many major retailers  list a honeymoon fund in the gifts the couple would like to have.

Plan your wedding with Wrap it up

Wrap It Up is a division of Bliss Weddings & Events, a Chicago-based event design and planning company nationally recognized for their full service, tailored approach to high end, visionary events. It is in this spirit of an extra personalized planning experience that founder, Renny designed the Wrap It Up concept; an à la carte service option for clients who would like guidance and assistance with a specific event need or stage in planning and want the assurance that only a truly expert planning team can provide. No matter the special occasion or size of the task, Wrap It Up pros are at your service to offer their pearls of wisdom, penchant for high style, or simply a few extra pairs of skilled hands so you can relish in the excitement of celebration, sans the stress. Wedding, shower, birthday bash, graduation party- let us wrap it up, so you can live it up! Check us out! http://www.wrapitupparties.com.


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